Yes, as in "virgin" virgin.
No, I don't use this line at parties as a way to sound hip or cool, although I am both hip and cool.
Newsflash: I'm content with that. Dare I even say, I'm a bit proud of standing my ground and not being ashamed with my choice.
I'll admit that being a 20-something virgin comes with its fair share of baggage, mostly in the form of questions. But lately, instead of other people doing the questioning, I've been doing a little soul searching and asking of my own.
WHY IS IT SUCH A TABOO FOR A WOMAN TO BE A VIRGIN?
Why does she (read: me) feel as though she constantly has to explain herself: why she's a virgin, the reasoning behind her choice, whether there is something "wrong" with her, when she plans to "seal the deal"?
Why on earth does she act so damn righteous about her choice?
Yet worn out from all the questioning?
And worse yet, why does everyone else feel the need to formulate a reason? Does it somehow make them feel better about themselves if they can concretely explain us, the supposed freaks of nature? Do they need to feel superior?
I don't sit around trying to justify why some people do the bedroom rumba before others, so I ask you: What gives others the right to join in on the crusade to make the term "virginity" such a bad word in our society?
Here's what I'd like - and I hope I speak on behalf of all virgins out there.
DONT JUDGE VIRGINS
Just stop believing the stereotypes. Please. It's just getting old, and quite frankly, a bit sad. No, I'm not a member of some church cult (I'm actually anti-church, thank you). No, my disability isn't the reason.
I don't think that my being a virgin makes me "pure" or any of those other crazy terms floating around out there. And I'm definitely not some repressed girl with family issues.
In fact, I think I've heard 'em all, so no other "far-out" stereotypes people make would surprise me anymore. Sorry to disappoint you on that one.
BE RESPECTFUL OF VIRGINS
Here we are, back to that word choice again. Need I remind you that it is my choice? You can never understand a person or her life until you've walked in her shoes.
I may not agree with your choices and you may not agree with mine. That doesn't mean we shouldn't respect each other.
DONT BE AFRAID TO ASK THE VIRGIN QUESTION
Obviously, I don't walk around wearing a T-shirt that says "Living
Virgin" with an arrow pointing upward to me, though that would probably give me some funny looks, wouldn't it? Come to think of it, it's almost worth doing just for the comic value alone.
BACK OFF THE VIRGINS
I think this one is self-explanatory, both to the anti-virgins out there and to guys in general.
THE TABOOS OF VIRGINITY
Will I end up being a real-life 40-year-old virgin? Who knows? Do I care? Hell no.
Recommended books (downloadable pdfs):Angel - Life Mapping A Vision Of Success
Brett Mckay - Guide To Being A Gentleman
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