7 Ways Texting Can Turn Her Off

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For those of you that text, whether you have a Blackberry or an Apple iPhone, text messaging is the most abused and misinterpreted form of communication out there in dating.

FOUR WAYS I THINK TEXTING IS GREAT:

1) "See you tonight at 7:00 at Joe's Restaurant." It's great for confirming things.

2) "Did you get home safely?" It's great as a good night kiss.

3) "What time are we meeting on Sunday? Let me know." It's great to reconfirm things.

4) It's great for late at night when you lob in the "What are you doing right now...?" text. It's a wonderful way to have verbal foreplay late at night when you're looking to connect with a lover or a booty call.

Texting is all about short conversations. However, texting can get ugly.

HERE ARE THE SEVEN WAYS THAT TEXTING CAN GET YOU INTO TROUBLE:

1) WORDS ARE OFTEN MISINTERPRETED. You can text somebody something that you think is joke, and they don't read it that way. This will get you into trouble, because they may never call you back.

2) TEXTING IS NOT INTENDED TO CANCEL A DATE. If you want to see somebody again, you need to call them and change the plans. Texting is the chicken way to blow someone off, whether you ever intended to see them or not.

3) DONT ASK SOMEONE OUT VIA TEXT MESSAGE. Women especially can't stand when a guy asks them out via text messaging. Every woman I've spoken to thinks that when a guy asks them out via text message, that he really is not that interested in them. And they all wish a guy would just pick up the phone. Guys, if you're interested, have some balls and just pick up the phone! Granted, some women will say yes to a text date, but they prefer if you call them.

4) IF YOU HAD A GREAT DATE THE NIGHT BEFORE, DONT TEXT THE PERSON THE MINUTE YOU GET UP THE NEXT MORNING. Wait a few hours. Let the post-date recap settle down on both sides. Give someone a little time to think about you. There's no harm in waiting a few hours, especially after a first date. You don't want to look overanxious.

5) ONCE YOUVE TEXTED BACK AND FORTH A FEW TIMES, and unless one of you is in a Turkish prison being tortured by a not-so-friendly cell mate, you need to pick up the phone and have a real conversation.

6) JUST BECAUSE YOU TEXTED THEM, doesn't mean they're going to respond. Here's another thing about texting. You're texting back and forth with someone, then you send something to them and they don't respond back. They may have gotten on the phone... they may have fallen asleep... or they may have gone into a meeting. But because texting is so impersonal, you don't know what happened to them.

7) LETS SAY YOU TEXTED SOMEONE ON A TUESDAY, they responded to your text, you texted them again and... now it's Friday and they still haven't texted back. What does someone do in that situation? They may not be keeping text count like you are. They may have forgotten to text you back because they got on a long phone call or got caught up in some work, and your text may have gotten lost. Let me ask all of you a question? Do you answer every email that comes in... or does one sometimes get buried and go unanswered? If you haven't heard from someone in a few days, pick up the phone and call them. The old ATT commercial was the best: "Reach out and touch someone." You never know what they're response is going to be. Most of the time you're going to be pleasantly surprised, but all of the time you're going to get your answer. That's what dating is all about... getting answers. Plus, you won't drive yourself and your friends crazy wondering.

There's a lot of misinterpretation that can happen via text messaging. Understanding all of this I just wrote will help you navigate the fun side of text dating, and help you avoid the bad side of text dating.

Texting is a great way for a little verbal foreplay to stay connected in someone's life. It's not a replacement for a phone conversation. So if you're hoarding your cell phone minutes, I suggest you contact T-Mobile (which I use) and get some more minutes. Start having conversations again instead of hiding behind text messaging!

Recommended books (downloadable pdfs):

Lovedrop - Kissing And Touching
Johm Overdurf - Beyond Words Languaging Change Thrugh The Quantum Field
Dating Insider - Seduction In The Year 2k

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