Why Are Younger Men Attracted To Older Women

If you’re familiar with the movie “The Graduate”, where a young Dustin Hoffman has an affair with the older and mature Mrs. Robinson, you may have a small grasp of why younger men sometimes like older women. Here in America, it’s rare but not uncommon for a younger man to be with an older woman. It’s appealing. It’s also alluring. A mature woman provides several attractive qualities.

The allure comes in several forms:

1. Older women are taboo; taboos are attractive

It’s a cultural taboo for a younger man to date a mature woman. It’s usually the other way around: an older male with a younger female. Much like the forbidden fruit, older women are theoretically off limits for younger guys. While it may be uncommon for a 21 year-old man to date a 31 year-old woman, it’s certainly not illegal. People would probably view the interaction as a novelty.

2. Mature women make men feel more comfortable

Young women have less experience with men and tend to be less stable in general than older women. Men like women who make them feel comfortable, emotionally. Also, as far as sexual maturity goes, women tend to peak in their late twenties, while men peak around age 18.
Young women may have hundreds of men chasing after them; this makes a young man feel the pressures of competition from other males. Older women offer an alternative. It’s nice to feel attractive; in the eyes of an mature woman, a young man may be a very attractive object.

3. Older women may be hunting for younger guys

There is a class of women known colloquially as “cougars”, these women are typically professional, attractive, and earn middle-class incomes without the help of a man. “Cougars” are women who may have been through a rough divorce and want the fun life of a single. “Cougars” tend to actively seek younger men, either at bars, on the internet, or in the work place.

4. Young men do not have much experience with women

Young men may simply not know what to expect with women. The rules of dating and relationships may be new territory to explore; it’s helpful to have someone with experience. It’s certainly nice to have a “take-charge” kind of women as a partner. People tend to want what they cannot have, or should not have. Mature women represent an unfulfilled fantasy for many young men. Many men have sexual fantasies about professional women, such as teachers, librarians,doctors, and authority figures. Dating an older women provides a real-life solution to such fantasies.

On the other hand, most people see less of a problem with older men dating younger women. Younger women are viewed as “trophy wives”, “gold-diggers” or even “home-wreckers”. The taboo of an older woman is a convoluted artifact of a patriarchal culture.

Fundamentally, human beings seek pleasure: if you’ve seen “The Graduate”, you’ll know that older women dating younger men tends to be a short-term experience. It’s fun while it lasts, but most likely, ephemeral.

Suggested reading (free books):

Mary Wood Allen - What A Young Woman Ought To Know
Tranceboy - Why Are Women Attracted To Men Who Are Bad For Them

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