The last day of the bootcamp is always comprised of all of the clients going out together in the stores and working on everything they've learned over the weekend. It's always a really great day.
I was with Justin, who is from Japan, and we were talking about the experience that a lot of guys have when they move to the United States. They may have been here a few years, and they know the language well, but they aren't entirely confident in speaking it yet.
The frustrating thing is that when they talk to people, they can hear them and understand what they are saying, but the immediate response in their head is in their first language.
The response in their head could be something really clever or funny, but then when they go to spit it out in English, it just doesn't work that well. It's frustrating. It's like, damn, that's not what I meant to say!
So when they come to something like a bootcamp and learn how to talk to the opposite sex, these guys think to themselves, oh my god, I have to be so fast! How can I think that quickly?
The problem is that they can't. And this frustrates them immensely! Deep down, they have so much to talk about, but they just aren't able to spit it out in English because the way that it sounds in their head is not the way it comes out.
They just aren't yet confident in their command of the English language. The words don't come out the way that they want them to, and sometimes it sounds funny.
But here's the thing: even I butcher the English language. You should hear some of the things that come out of my mouth. I can't pronounce the word 'drawer.' To me, that should be pronounced 'draw-ah.' According to Rey, I also butcher the word 'water,' making it sound like 'wadder.'
We all have some type of language barrier. Guys that come from another country evaluate themselves so much more and they are so incredibly self-critical. But you just have to get out there.
The more you talk, the better you'll get at the language. Look at Rey. Rey couldn't speak a word of English four years ago, and now he can carry on a conversation with just about anyone. Sure, there are times where he butchers the language, and there are times where he speaks a little bit too lowly - but you have to realize that it's a long evolution.
So when you go out there, just do it! Just speak slowly and with a smile on your face. If you're having a good time with it, people will be attracted to you.
There is a guy named Yu that butchers the English language so bad - he is Engrish beyond belief. But he's always having a good time with it, and when the words don't come out right, nobody even cares.
If you feel like everyone is evaluating your language skills, don't feel that way. No one is looking at you and laughing. What they are thinking about is, oh what a nice guy. And the other person will actually slow down their speech automatically for you.
If your energy is there, it will keep the other person interested, and they will want to stay engaged in the conversation. So remember: it's about your energy, it's not about how you say it!
CHECK OUT MORE OF DAVID WYGANT AT HIS WEBSITE.
Recommended books (downloadable pdfs):
Il Holdridge - Us Army Military LeadershipDavid X - Rules Of David X
Adam Gilad - Interview With David Wygant
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