Newbie Mission

Christian Bones: I am a 35 year old RAFC. I have had two long-term relationships and got them the old fashioned AFC way. (don't know how, but when you're friends for a while, it kinda helps and you just ask them to be your girlfriend) I have always been a little shy (especially around women, not knowing what to say, carrying on a conversation, etc.) So I tried Svengali's Newbie Mission for a day and it worked wonders in helping me build my confidence. I'm learning quickly chicks are just that. CHICKS. Even just saying "Hi" to some of them is weird. Most are nice and say "Hi" back and some are just downright snobby. (maybe they're on "the rag", their cat died, whatever.) Anyways, the reason I am writing this is because I do want to get married (no sarcastic comments please :) That is my goal in using Fast Seduction)) and want to meet as many quality women as possible (from what I have learned here). No Lay Reports yet as I am still new at this (got some numbers) and am working on my next step (the Attract phase) and hopefully with my newfound knowledge I will get to the Close phase sooner rather than later. Anyways, thanks formhandle for a great site and even a Newbie at 35 can have success if you just TRY! TRY! TRY!

Juggler: Since you are looking for a woman to marry try this next. Write down all the ideal qualities you are looking for in a mate. Maybe: a good listener, likes travel, wants 3 kids, likes sex in the morning, etc.. whatever you desire. Now think up some routines on each topic - a funny story, a pattern, a game or anything that explores the topics in a way that is interesting to girls. Now, when you are talking with a girl bring these subjects up. Example:

You: "Where have you traveled?"

Her: "Only a little around Europe." (Blah answer. But no problem. You are ready to warm the subject up.)

You: "I just got back from the Galapagos. have you been? No. Well, the penguins there have the most interesting mating ritual..."

Her: That is so funny. I was in Scotland last year and....

Get it? You are entertaining while at the same time testing her to see if she can qualify for wife material. Keep in mind Juggler's 90-10 rule. That is, you must be prepared to provide 90 percent of the conversation at the beginning of an interaction with a woman until she is warmed up. If you go in and give 50%, expecting she will give 50% - like most conversations in the non-PU world, you will be disappointed. She will give only 10%. That adds up to 60%. Not enough and the conversation will stall and collapse. So be big enough for the both of you and then taper back as she gets warmed up.

LoveDrop: You need to do MYSTERY's newbie drill. Make 3 approaches per hour, 4 hours per night, 4 nights per week. Assuming a 30 day month, this is about 200 approaches per month. For each approach, say something to open ("hi" is fine), spend 10-20 minutes talking/attracting, then, based on her indicators of interest, you either close or eject. In your case, I'd say close every time anyway, just for the practice. It doesn't matter if you don't exactly know what to do...you will learn naturally. Plus this site has plenty of material on that topic for you to research. Don't worry, this drill will turn you into a machine.

>>What is the easiest approach? I've already gotten past the "hi" part. Do I compliment her on something she's wearing? or ask "How was your day today?" I have the F/M part down. The problem I have is attracting and carrying on the conversation after the initial "hi."

Style: Start a computer file. Make the following headings:

(1). OPENERS
(2). DEMONSTRATE VALUE
(3). ESTABLISH CONNECTION/RAPPORT
(4). PHASE SHIFT
(5). *CLOSE
(6). #CLOSE

(You can also make subheadings of NEGS and PATTERNS/SS.)

Christian Bones: I have already created the folders in my computer and am working on filling them up now.
Grab your favorite stuff, test out some of your own tactics, figure out your most interesting stories, and put whatever can work for you under each heading. Now you know exactly what to do, and how to escalate. Work on proceeding one step at a time, and come back here and seek advice for each sticking point. The secret, as you see, is sometimes simply knowing WHAT TO SAY/DO and WHEN TO SAY/DO IT.

MrMorg: The best approach IMO is making a humorous observance of the environment. some goofballs clothes, the bird that just shit on a car, the awesome meal you just ate, and try to lead it into an open ended question, not a "yes"/"no" question, avoid those at all cost. Then practice working in techniques.

NGarwood: I'm a newbie so take this with a grain of salt... I've found that "Hi" and "How're you doing?" are both fantastic ways to go nowhere really fast (if you're a newbie). The PUAs can claim that it's all attitude (and it *is*) but your attitude will never surface unless you have something to say. Commenting on the environment is good; an open ended question asking for her opinion is also good. In my limited newbie experience, I've found that in order to get to the point where "Hi" is all you need,you have to start with a more concrete plan.

Juggler: Yes you are right. However, the phrase you need to learn is, "How are you?" not "How are you doing."

"How are you?" is a great opener. But it is the follow up which makes it great.

You: "How are you?"
Her: "Fine."
You: "You know, it's kind of rude not to ask how I am after I asked how you are."
Her: "Okay, how are you?"
You: "I am wonderful. You would not believe what I have been doing today. Have you ever been involved in something really dangerous and after it was over you had an incredible high, as if you just had the most intense sex? Well today I..."

You have to be ready to deliver 90% of the conversation. If you look for that magic subject that will get her opening up and sharing with you her innermost desires you are going to be disappointed. Realize, you can take almost any opening and with creativity turn it into gold. Just remember that she will not give you help until you warm her up. Until then you are all alone.

Suggested reading (free books):

Kevin Hogan - Covert Persuasion
Tyler Durden - Ev Questions

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