Sunday, December 20, 2009

5 Killer Techniques To Skyrocket Your Online Dating Success With Women

5 Killer Techniques To Skyrocket Your Online Dating Success With Women Image
Five simple techniques that help men dramatically improve their response rate with their emails and to increase getting dates through online dating and social networking websites.

Online dating is becoming the preferred method of dating for a lot of men and women. It was a held generalization a few years ago that you either had to be socially awkward or a psychopath to have a real profile on a matchmaking site. That was a few years ago. Due to the influx of social networking sites, it appears that the overflow of serious date seekers have been introduced to the concept of meeting decent people online, and have started to use sites like Match.com, Nerve.com, and other specialty sites (not eHarmony). Men are meeting women online these days, and are having incredible success.

This article is specifically for men, there are beautiful women to be found online, you just have to seek the women out efficiently and give yourself the best chances for responses to your emails and requests.

I've had incredible success with online dating, and in this article outlined some of the surefire tactics I've used to dramatically increase women's response rate and getting dates.

PHOTO ROTATION FOR HIGHER RESPONSES


I can't take credit for this tactic, but will mention it first because of its sheer simplicity in boosting your success. I learn about this technique in an interview I had with Tim Ferriss, author of The 4-Hour Workweek. I asked Tim what yielded the highest profile views with his online dating efforts, and I later confirmed this technique for myself. The trick is to rotate your profile photo every week. This does a number of things. It places your profile near the top of search results because of it being new. Matchmaking sites love to have active users, and this is one of the ways they use to gauge it. Another valuable reason is that it keeps women who weren't interested in you before because of a particular "look" you may have had in another photo that didn't stand out to them in her search results before. Oh, and before I forget, never post a photo with your shirt off. Never.

NEVER WINK


You may have seen on some of these online dating sites a feature called "Wink" or "Poke". Hmm... poke? Don't use these features. They are completely and utterly counterproductive to you. They are for women to express a small interest in you, not for you to be a wuss to express interest in a woman that you think is a good match.

Use Direct Subject Lines To Get Your Point Across


In that same interview with Tim, he said he was getting a 20% or so response rate. Then one of his Virtual Assistants tried a very different approach, a subject line with a direct attitude. He used "Looking For A Date" as the subject line with amazing results. Apparently, his return email rate got a 50% jump to 70% of every email he sent out with that subject line. I don't recommend using that particular line, but come up with your own direct lines. Remember, when a woman is getting 50+ emails a day from every time of man, it's a good idea to stand out.

DONT BE TOO DOMINANT, BUT DONT BE A PUSHOVER

A lot of guys send out emails saying, "You're so cute" or "I had to contact you, I think we have a lot in common." Yawn. Take it from a purely statistical standpoint. When you're receiving those emails one after the other, they're getting old. Look at her profile, does something jump out? If so, mention it in the first few lines of the email, but not in a pushover way. If she has an interest in Costa Rica, be flirty about your take on it. "You've been to Costa Rica? I'll take it that you dodged Miguel, that local conman at the airport in San Jose, and got to surf in " Basically, you want to point out something about her in a non-sucking up way. But you don't want to be an asshole by saying "You've been to Costa Rica? Hmm... Maybe we can go together sometime, if you're lucky!" Ok, that screams creepy, and delete is the destination for anything that in overtly says it. What I'm saying is, you want to be confident, but not seem arrogant, and you want to come across with security. It's OK to send longer emails, but don't jump into deep identity conversations at first, remember you've got some time if you make that good impression, so take it easy and keep it light.

LIMIT YOUR SEARCH TO INCREASE YOUR RESULTS


Guys want it all. They want every woman that they find attractive. This mindset is the approach most men are wired with, which can be a flaw when the algorithms on matchmaking websites kick in. Basically, say you live in 90028, Hollywood. When you search with a 10 mile radius, because of the population you will get drastically different results than a 5 mile radius search using the exact same 90028 zip code. What's going on? Wouldn't the search results just return as many possible results as it can? No, because that's not the way they're setup. Here's the flaw in their system, and how I used to search for women in my local area. Most online dating sites have a result limit, which dictates that if 100 pages of results are returned for a 10-mile radius search from 90028 then only 50 pages will show as results. This excludes a bunch of women in your 90028 zip code because of preference for more active users in that 10-mile radius. Another technique that you should employ if you really want to search in the 10-mile radius (or whatever distance you prefer) is to choose preferences. Say you love brunettes; search a larger radius around your zip-code (depending on the population in your local area) with that specification and you'll get more results that you're interested in.

By using these tactics, you'll dramatically increase your online dating success, and won't be wasting so much money on the monthly fees which yield little or no women to date.

If you're interested in taking your online dating to a new level, check out David Deangelo's Meeting Women Online program, which features a bunch of experts in the field giving step-by-step methods that they've used.

Recommended books (downloadable pdfs):

Liz Larsen - The Definitive Guide To Success With Women
Andy Hodge - Never Sleep Alone Again Succeed With Women
Abbas Abedi - 5 Steps To Online Dating Success

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Saturday, December 19, 2009

Your Perfect Wedding And Why Hire A Professional Photographer To Capture It For You

Your Perfect Wedding And Why Hire A Professional Photographer To Capture It For You

By Peter Estenoz

To the same extent photographing a wedding on the seaside about in Key West in together with the onlookers I saw a tiny girl jolly as she was looking at the bride. She exclaimed "she looks beautiful like a princess, mommy!" And, so her impression and quest of the ample wedding elaborate begins.

Captured in all the fairytale cinema wedding you see the emotions that lead up to the plain government. It starts out with a reason skirmish boy meets girl. Sparks beam, thus, they amount their first kiss, they put off with their relationship overcoming all the obstacles that run of the mill life puts in assumption of them, and being he pops the question and she says "Yes, I'll joint you!" What you see contiguous in the epitome is their ample wedding, what you don't see is all the discussions and research that went in to make it so.

What happens contiguous is thereabouts a blur to the couple, as they knoll the festival with family and friends. It's a trice in time which fills the hearts with emotions that cannot be duplicated. The question to ask is how will this on one occasion in a lasting trice be captured? How will you be able to memorize this event and amount it with family and friends, who were not able to be there? Or equal your little or grandchildren as an heirloom to pass down? This is a big belief, practically as big as being you alleged "Yes, I'll joint you!" Soul you pass away this to family and friend with tiny or no experience in wedding photography? Or to a name who isn't on the same wavelength with anywhere you are holding the government and able to summary not only the thrill that surrounds you, but you in the beauty? This is anywhere the amount of discussions and research begins.

Tell in professionally photographing comparatively hundreds of weddings about on the coral reef of Key West, allows me to tell you that only a professional can deliver what your creature looks for in each one your shooting and fasten of your "ample wedding". To spare the years, seeing all the innumerable changes and trends with wedding shooting, beginning first with psychic format, separation to 35mm advertise and now to digital, you be familiar with and I be familiar with the amount of shooting, as it is the darling way to summary associates emotional moments with family members and friends. Then the amount of hiring and confirming the experience of a professional photographer or videographer for your wedding is costly.

These are questions you basic ask, don't be shy or frightened to ask, as this is whom you are considering hiring for your wedding, your ample wedding, your elaborate wedding.

In the region of the Author:


Learning pompous about Key West Weddings. Examination by Peter Estenoz's site anywhere you can find out all about Key West Coast Matrimony Post and what it can do for you.
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Thursday, December 17, 2009

Top 10 Mens Fragrances That Attract Women

Top 10 Mens Fragrances That Attract Women Image
We all know that it is important to smell good when trying to attract women. However do you know which fragrances are the most effective? Do you know how to apply your fragrance to get the most out of it? In this post I will take you through the tips I have learnt as well as the fragrances that smell the best for attracting women!

ROTATE YOUR FRAGRANCE


You should always have a few different fragrances. I recommend at least 3-4 which you can rotate often. You should wear a different fragrance each day. This shows your spontaneous. Women hate predictable men. If you rotate your fragrances regularly women will find you more attractive. This is because they wont be able to predict what you will be smelling like each day making you unpredictable. With the right selection of fragrances it also shows that you are a person who has style and class.

ALWAYS WEAR A FRAGRANCE


No matter what time of day it is always wear a fragrance. Whether your at work, shopping at a supermarket or going out in the evening always aim to look and smell your best. You never know when you will bump into that attractive woman that you have been waiting for.

APPLYING YOUR FRAGRANCE TO CERTAIN PARTS OF YOUR BODY


The best parts of your body to apply fragrance are areas of the body that give off the most body heat. Apply your fragrance to the following body parts:

* Wrists
* Arm pits
* Neck
* Behind your ears

Your body heat activates the fragrance increasing the strength of smell, making it last longer. Colder areas of the body will lose its smell quickly.

CHOOSING THE RIGHT FRAGRANCE


Stay away from brand fragrances such as Calvin Klein, Polo Sport and Paul Smith. If you wear these types of fragrances you will be no different from the man who thinks its not worth investing in a decent fragrance. Also most cheaper brands smell pretty bad. The last thing you want to do is put off women with your cheap smelling fragrance.

Surprisingly some of the top fragrance brands such as Gucci and Armani are not really expensive at all. Especially compared to their other products. Spending money on a $40 bottle of high quality fragrance is a much better investment compared to buying a cheap nasty smelling fragrance for $20.

MY TOP 10 LIST


Below you will find my top 10 list of my favourite fragrances. I have owned all of these at some point in my life. I actually own 7 of them at the moment. I have tried a lot of shitty fragrances in the past so I know what I am talking about when it comes to a top quality fragrance. Build up a collection for the perfect 7 day rotation like I have done or pick one that's your favourite. I have included links so you can buy them online for the best prices I could find. If you want to smell them before you buy, go to you local department store and try and then you will know what I am talking about.

If you like getting compliments from women on how great you smell then definatley try out my top 10 fragrance selection below.

ARMANI CODE


BY: Giorgio Armani

SMELL: A blend of lemon, Bergamot, Gusiac Wood, Tonka Bean, Olive Flower

DESCRIPTION: Sexy Masculine Scent That Combines Sleek Seductiveness With Sophistication

PERFECT FOR: Evenings

GUCCI ENVY


BY: Gucci

SMELL: Musk, Amber, Cedar, Nutmeg, Ginger

DESCRIPTION: A Refreshing Sexy Masculine Scent

PERFECT FOR: Daytime

CHANEL PLATINUM EGOISTE


BY: Chanel

SMELL: Corriander, Bergamot, Rosewood, Ylang-Ylang, Jasmine, Vetiver, Amber, Sandalwood, Ceder

DESCRIPTION: A Powerful Refreshing Scent

PERFECT FOR: Evening

CHANEL POUR MONSIEUR


BY: Chanel

SMELL: Sicilian Lemon, Tunisian Neroli, Petit Grain, Cardamom, White Pepper, Virginian Cedarwood, Vetiver

DESCRIPTION: A Refined Elegant Fragrance For Men

PERFECT FOR: Daytime A Refined Elegant Fragrance For Men

VERSACE MAN


BY: Versace

SMELL: Neroli, Bergamot, Florals, Black Pepper, Caramom, Saffron, Tabacco Leaves, Amber, Labanum

DESCRIPTION: Elegant Sophisticated Smell For Men

PERFECT FOR: Evening

D&G THE ONE

BY: Dolce & Gabbana

SMELL: Bergamont, Coriander, Cedar, Tabacco

DESCRIPTION: Modern, Sensual, Cosmopolitan And Fearless

PERFECT FOR: Evening

D&G THE ONE GENTLEMAN

BY: Dolce & Gabbana

SMELL: Pepper, Fennel, Lavender, Cardamom, Vanilla, Patchouli

DESCRIPTION: For Confident and Sophisticated Men

PERFECT FOR: Daytime or Casual

VERA WANG FOR MEN


BY: Vera Wang

SMELL: Green Leaves, Yuzu, Nutmeg, Leather, Anis, Sandalwood, Tabacco

DESCRIPTION: Created For A Man With Taste And Refinement

PERFECT FOR: Evening

ACQUA DI GIO


BY: Giorgio Armani

SMELL: Lavender, Juniper, Cumin, Ylang-Ylang, Sandalwood, Amber

DESCRIPTION: A Contemporary Expression Of Masculinity

PERFECT FOR: Casual

GIVENCHY PI


BY: Givenchy

SMELL: Light Citrus, Woody, Vanilla

DESCRIPTION: The PI Man Is A Man Of Action Who Always Surpasses Himself

PERFECT FOR: Evening



Recommended books (downloadable pdfs):

Rion Williams - Mens Guide To Women
Olga Lebekova - Top 10 Mistakes Men Make While Dating Russian Women
Simon Heong - How To Instantly Attract Any Woman

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Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Dating And Relationships

Dating And Relationships Cover
Once you've figured out how to attract women, you're bound to find one who's particularly interesting to you. One that you might actually, um, love. One that you might want to keep around for a bit. Hey, you might even meet someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

"If you are ready to take your education to the next level and advance at a faster pace, then you need to listen to, read, and watch my other programs."

Even though I've made most of this book about meeting women, I don't feel that it would be complete without at least a few ideas on how to keep a woman attracted to you for the long haul.

But first of all, here's my take on why relationships fail:

When you first start dating someone you really like, the body releases a combination of chemicals that are quite literally intoxicating. These chemicals cause you to want to be with that person all the time, stay up all night talking to them, and have sex with them three times a day.

But twelve to eighteen months later, the chemicals change. The intoxicating chemicals are replaced by 'stability' chemicals. The 'stay-up-all-night-can't-be-away-from-her-have-sex-three-times-a-day' feeling goes away and the 'let's-settle-down-and-have-two-kids-and-buy-a-minivan' chemicals take over. Deal with it. (If you want to understand this process better, read The Alchemy of Love and Lust by Theresa Crenshaw.)

So now that you know this, how do you keep this whole thing from turning into an episode of "All in the Family"?

Well, the short answer is, keep up the fun, interesting, unpredictable behavior. Notice the details. Do thoughtful things.

Here's something that I've learned in life: If you want to get back more than you give, then play the stock market. It's not gonna happen in relationships. In fact, if you want to get a lot back, you're probably going to have to give even more.

Most people are selfish and say, "I'm not going to give more than I get." But instead of getting a lot, all they get is old and unhappy. I've found that it's much better to give a ton and get back a lot in return, not caring about the fact that I didn't get as much as I gave than to give little or none and get back little or none.

Relationships aren't like investing. If you want a lot, get used to giving more. But it's worth it in the end, because love, attention, humor, and fun aren't like money. If you give them out, you don't have less. You have MORE. Get it?

Now that you've read this book, you probably have that same feeling that I had when I first learned all of this amazing material. You're probably excited.

Well, there's more.

If you are ready to take your education to the next level and advance at a faster pace, then you need to listen to, read, and watch my other programs. They take this foundation and expand the concepts both wide and deep... and show you tricks and shortcuts for everything from approaching women to taking things to a physical level.

Also try this free pdf e-books:

Chris Jackson - 101 Ways To Build Happy Lasting Relationships
Laurie Weiss - 24 Tips For Having A Great Relationship

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Sunday, December 13, 2009

The Effective Trends In Leadership

The Effective Trends In Leadership
Print via WikipediaLeadership Skills Pronounce and Get through The Persuasive Managerial Trends and Strategies for the Premeditated Growth in Dubai

THE Persuasive Someone

* The Limiting Delegate to Piece

* Pruning Activities Consequent from Willful Get through

* Once more Staffing, Malorganization and Bug in Facts

FOCUSING ON Partaking, Fight, Values AND Budding Genus

* Exclusive Self Setting up and Budding Others

* Handiwork Meetings Vivid

* Alternative Steps for Persuasive Staffing

* Budding Opportunities for the Detailed Partial of Your Kind

ELEMENTS OF Persuasive Management

* Home Group into the Alternative

* Focusing on Solutions Relatively of Effort

* Pronounce Growth for Management

Managerial Pronounce AND Pull

* First-rate Get through for Premeditated Leaders

* Pinnacle in a Event of Difficulty and Crowdedness

* Pinnacle Organizations of the Premeditated

* Challenges for Leaders in the Being Hunger strike

* New Pronounce Competencies

Get through Innovation IN Group

* Decent a Get through Pacemaker

* Home the Premeditated of Get through

* Growth and Setting up for Executives

* Virtuosity Get through for Executives

Coupled Articles

* Servant Pronounce - Compliments from the Front position Desk! (linked2leadership.com)

* Aptitude Opportunity: Arrogant, Possible Cash - Pharmaceutical and Consumer Goods, Comprehensive Manufacturing ">

Labels: alpha male men the alpha male guide the alpha male system alpha male tattoo alpha male opinion alpha male magazine free online relationship advice senior citizen online dating
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Regression Defense Mechanisms By Sigmund Freud

Regression Defense Mechanisms By Sigmund Freud
When IS REGRESSION?

Regression is the reversion to an previous stage of revolt in the part of fluctuating judgment or impulses. In the same way as confronted by disturbing activities, people sometimes sovereignty coping strategies and waning to patterns of posture used previous in revolt. According to shrink Sigmund Freud, regression is a covering machinery leading to the surface or ongoing reversion of the ego to an previous stage of revolt somewhat than power fluctuating impulses in a best quality adult way.

Anna Freud optional that people act out behaviors from the stage of psychosexual revolt in which they are keen. For example, an type keen at an previous developmental stage may well cry or grumble upon hardship difficult news. Dwindle Joel Gold ingots suggests that crafty use of "Start" (Adaptive Regression in the service of the Ego) can sometimes advocate productive benefits. To the size that one is power judgment and impulses less like an adult, Start involves play, thanks and instinctive pleasures, and originality.

Examples of Regression


The regression as covering machinery can be clearly observed in the babyhood stage of revolt, although, it is not out of the ordinary to see such a way of coping with disturbing life activities in the course of adults as well:

* An towering petty will right away begin again to wet the bed or suck his thumb having the status of the new baby comes home.
* A college supporter, made known from home for the first time, will want to cede her teddy maintain with her.
* A wife refuses to wheel a car flatly time it causes the family drastically disorganization. A respect of her forbid is that her husband has to help yourself to her everywhere.
* Regressions are a community culprit in marriage dismal. Recklessly, the man no longer sees his wife as a peer, a friend, a lover, a mate -- he sees the enormous mother! And he grumpiness. He whines. He pouts. He turns passive-aggressive.
* A person who suffers a mental dissolution assumes a fetal position, rocking and sobbing. Regressing having the status of under a great vending of stress, a person may be refusing to set the bed and engage in everyday, everyday activities.
* A person who has suffered a crabby divorce or deficiency of a spouse may want to proceeds the home of his/her babyhood - colonize heat kick since upset overruled all unorthodox feelings.

REGRESSION Co-worker In Reawaken OF PSYCHOSEXUAL Development


Regressive posture can be complicated and stale, or simple and above suspicion. A person may waning to an old, habitually offspring posture to heavens feelings of anger. Regression reflects the basic problem to gain instinctual performance at a less-developed phase. It is exceedingly a everyday occurrence having the status of it is mount in realistic perspectives, as a crucial share of regression is indispensable for relaxation, slumber, and orgasm in sexual intercourse. Regression is moreover intended an indispensable simultaneous of the productive go by. Regression only becomes a problem having the status of it is used generally to avoid adult situations and causes problems in the individual's life.

So, regression is a form of retreat, leaving back to a time having the status of the person felt safer and somewhere the stresses in question were not recognized, or somewhere an deafening parent would help yourself to them made known.

In a Freudian view, the stress of fixations caused by frustrations of the person's beyond psychosexual revolt may be used to explain a range of regressive behaviors, including:

* Spoken fixation can lead to inflate smoking or eating, or vocal happenings in the midst of verbal mishandle.
* Anal fixation can lead to anal retentive behaviors such as tidying and grace. Obsessive-compulsive disorders can adopt in the midst of colonize that lead to awfulness, high-pitched group, or stinginess
* Phallic fixation can lead to adjustment jumble (the alteration of mystic existence into physical symptoms) which is hidden away sexual impulses.

Freud proven that "it is prone for guaranteed fixations to be moved out trailing in the train of revolt, and each of these may give an wound of the libido that has been hard-pressed off - be first, probably, with the ensuing acquired fixations, and leaving on, as the illness develops, to the fresh ones".

HOW TO DEAL?

If the person with whom you are communicating is show regressive symptoms, you can lay to rest to their petty territory in guaranteed ways, in the midst of plunder a parent position of manipulate (promotion or distinct) or join them in their petty place (subsequently building alignment).

REGRESSION AS Remedial Avenue


Sigmund Freud introduced the idea of regression as a way to explain his patients' emotional or unlegislated behaviors and moods. He optional that in the train of revolt a person may become "keen" at a stage, and find it crabby to start again to mature properly; regression is a go by that helps the person to rant that stage and move on from it. One of Freud's partners, such as Sandor Ferenczi, tense regression as a useful part of cure, but moreover felt that it was prone to boost regression by behaving in parental or promotion ways to patients, flatly holding their hands or cuddling them.

In imitation of Making War II, regression was systematically discussed as part of the treatment for adults and new who had been distressed via the war. John Bowlby, the developer of attachment theory, commented joyfully on treatments that stirred regression by kind for new as if they were infants. Just as, Bruno Bettelheim planned to treat autistic new by feeding them with bottles and provision castle in the sky amounts of chocolate and unorthodox treats. These practices were allegedly based on the idea that if people may well be caused to revert in their revolt, they may well furthermore be guided to summarize or restate the steps of early revolt and to become apparent as mature beings.

Regression was engaged so seriously that research by T.X. Barber was overall on people who were "hypnotically regressed" to see whether their posture was honorable move unseen for the age they were believed to be. In fact, it was not honorable appropriate-- but it was the posture the participants were assured was move unseen for faithful ages. Quiet, the benefits of regression remained part of some systems of cure, in actual fact in Britain, somewhere "famous names" like Donald Winnicott and Michael Balint intended regression an genuine part of their methods. In the 1970s, R.D. Laing stirred regression as part of his attempts to treat high-minded mental illnesses. Transactional Analyze in the Connected States functional within walking distance attitudes.

These days, psychoanalysts may still use the regression formation as it was optional by Freud, but are best present to use "reparenting" techniques. Cognitive-behavioral psychologists are present to use the formation at all. Unmoving, outside treatments such as Affection Psychiatric therapy may still bring to bear what they call "age regression" methods, rocking, bottle-feeding, and diapering towering new in an step to rescue them back to early developmental stages, except in 2006 the American Competent Someone on Assault of Young decried such practices.

"Sources and Thin Information:"http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Regression (psychology)"http://people.emich.edu/pclark/freud/regression.html"http://changingminds.org/explanations/behaviors/coping/regression.htm"http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/child-myths/201003/i-regress-is-there-such-thing-psychological-regression"http://www.lvrj.com/living/52828577.html"
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Non Verbal Cues To Representational Patterns

Non Verbal Cues To Representational Patterns Cover
Eye movements signify which coding systems is bein; accessed. If someone was recalling a telephone conversation, her eyes would be shifting to the left or right. The future or past aspect of this diagram depends of the handedness of a person. If he is right
handed the future is to his right, This information is helpful to catch all the clues of someone’s coding system.

- Visual
- Auditory
- Kinestetic

STRATEGIES

Strategy - A strategy is a particular sequence of representations that, when followed, produces a specific behavior or outcome leading the rapport.

Criteria- What if fakes to fulfill the strategy. C/osely linked to values. All criteria serves to move a person towards an objective or away from a problem.

Most of us use a combiitiou of the five representational systems to a specific state, behavior, or emotion. For example, can you think the last time you decided what you wanted to eat? Did you first see a picture, then imagined what it would taste like? Or did you smell it first, then imagine the taste? Let’s test it.

Simple Strategy:

What if I said to you, right now, “Would you like some hot fajitas?” What is your answer. Yes or No. Now, the important thing is not the answer it is the process you used to get the answer. When I think about fajitas the first thing that pops &~to the sound of sizzling steamy’fresh chicken crackling the air. Then almost instantly I visualize in full color a picture of the waitress at the Hard Rock Cafe carrying the black cast iron skillet to my table packed full of the colorful entree’. Then, I imagme, as my mouth starts to water, what it will be like to chomp down on the slightly blacked chicken with a mouthful of guacamole and sour cream. After imaginmg all that inside my head, what do you think my answer would be?

But more importantly, how could you sell me on a different type of food. It is very simple. Fmt, &scribe the smell. Then paint a picture of how good it looks. Then, tell me how it taste. If you do it in that order, convincingly, I will want it. It’s the process. In this case, the order is just as important as creating believable images for me to see, hear, or taste. Likewise, if you have seven digits, of all equal value, the order you push them on the telephone is critically important to who will pick up on the other end. Begin to recognize the order that people access certaiu systems.

Eliciting Attraction Strategy

So, can the same strategy elicitation and playback work for having someone’s mouth water over dating you? Of course. Frost you must find out a time when s/he really wanted a specific lover. You will rarely get the exact criteria if you generalize. Be specific. Ask about a certain person. For this example you are a woman out on a date with Art You are midway through the main course when the conversation turns to past relationships. You used to dread this part of the conversation but this time you lolow it will give you the information that you need to discover his love strategy. You spend as little energy as you can on the break up. What you are interested in, and say it, is why you found her attractive in the first Place:

“When did you realize that you were ‘really attracted to her?”

Or, if you at-e not takiug about a specific person.. .

“Art, can you remember a time when you were totally attracted to someone?”

Remember the content of this memory is not important (If the content seems to be too important choose another memory. For example if he chooses the girl that just dumped him yesterday, he may have a hard time visualizing her picture without feeling the pain of the breakup. Choose his first love, or someone he really felt attracted to but never actually went out with.) Your mission is to get Art into the state of being attracted.

“Art, can you tell me the very first thing that caused you to be attracted? Was it...
Something you saw? Or was it...
Something you heard? Or was it...
Something you felt?”

His response might be something like think

- “How could I ever forget that? Jeep, it was like rockets went off in my mind. I was just wild about that girl know? I can just see her now, right there in my mind’s eye, standing behind the pizza counter smiling with
those her big blue eyes staring at me.”
- “And the very first thing that attracted, you was...”
- “Oh yeah, it had to be here eyes. She just looked so innocent, so sweet; ”
- “Art, after you saw her there next to the pizza counter, what was the very next thing you remember that attracted you? Was it...
Something you saw? Or was it...
Something you heard? Or was it.. .
Something you felt?”

Again, you have asked him to be very sensory specific.

“Hmmm. I can’t recall exactly. I just remember me saying to myself. What a great girl. She must be so sweet. I wish I had a girlfriend like that” That’s when she said ‘Hi’ to me. ”

So, now you know the second part of his love strategy is auditory. He has to say something to himself or hear her say something. Of course you now know the next question.

“Art, after you saw her standing there, you told yourself you wanted a girlfriend like her, and she said hi... what was the very next thing that you remember that attracted you in that intense way? Was it...
Something you saw? Or was it...
Something you heard? Or was it...
something you felt?”

“There is nothing more I can recalL After we talked briefly, I just knew. I just had that feeling. I just wondered how good it would feel to hold herm my arms. There are some things that you just get a feeling about. Y’know.. . right here in my stomach.”

Now that Art has told you such seemingly unimportant details, you have the exact love potion to tnm his motor on and tnrn hhn into your melting love slave. He begins with a picture, then sounds, then feelings. Now, replay it in a different content.

Remember that a good portion of establishing rapport has much to do with offering back someone’s behavior, we may now begin to weave Art a story that taps in to his attmction strategy. We base this methodology on the unconscious delight we experience when we’re related to through metaphor.

Knowing Art’s attraction strategy will allow you to tell him a story (content) around the framework (context) of his attraction formula, thereby causing him to be attracted. Keep this in mind Remember deep levels of rapport can be initiated by running his strategy but changing the content so as to bypass his consciousness.

You find him suddenly and miraculously attracted at some unconscious Level. Your statement using his attraction strategy. different content.

“Art., judging from, your point of view, it looks to me like you can really see what attracts you to someone. I’ve had the same experience. Just by looking at the right person will literally make my bells chime. I just go inside and say “Hmmm, what a great smile, what great eyes. So attractive. Just my type.”

You know in that tone of voice. It tells me, in that warm special way, that this person is special. It just creates butterflies in my stomach. Can you image that happening to you, instantly?’

Realize how effective this simple system is. The above example simply used the representational systems only. Imagine how powerful you will be when you begin to combined this technique with the other tools you will learn (anchoring, submadalities, and Magic words).

Suggested reading (pdf e-books):

Ken Lingu - Basic Massage Course Elementary Tutorial Notes
Chris Jackson - Importance Of Non Verbal Communication In Military Leadership
Milton Erickson - Milton Model And Hypnotic Patterns

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