Be A Man And Take Control

A few weeks ago Michael Stoute and myself did a Podcast titled "The Lost Art of Being a Man." The podcast was all about going back to basics and being more of a man to not only help you in attracted women, but to help you in life. I got a lot of questions regarding more examples so I thougth this might help!

Its very interesting to see how much girls expect us to take initiative. Just watch them in clubs when they stand in circles with friends and pretend to have fun, waiting for something to happen.

In reality, they are there waiting for someone to approach them and sweep them off their feet. Its what they dream of. You need to change your beliefs,about girls playing an active role when it comes to seduction and sex. The less you expect from her, and the less she has to do in seduction process, the stronger your game will be. You will be much more successful when you take control. Girls adore guys who take control of the interaction and the relationship.

Let me explain exactly what you need to do to become like this:

1. Never ask for permission when you decide to do something, ie, Would you like to dance? Would you like to sit over there?, etc.
2. When you are in a situation with a girl where a decision needs to be made, take the lead and decide for her. Example: You are not sure if you want to go to dinner or movie. Pick one. Dont ask her which she wants to do or what restaurant she likes. She wants to follow your lead. She wants you to be the man in the relationship.
3. When she is uncomfortable in a situation, take control and make the changes required to make her feel comfortable. Example: You are making out with her, but you can feel that the people around are making her feel uncomfortable. Take the lead and move her to place where she feels more discreet.

Another example: You are picking her up in a bar and you stand and talk for 45 minutes. Everything is going good, but if you do a quick body scan and notice she is wearing high heels. Trust me, it hurts to stand for three hours in those shoes but you will rarely hear that from a girl. Say, Hey lets go sit down there... Itll be more comfortable. You will rarely hear a woman make that suggestion. Thats your job.

You need to pay attention to how she feels all the time. Dont ask her because you will get the wrong answers. Instead, keep checking her body language and try to sense how she feels. Get good at reading womens subcommunications. Watch, listen and be aware.

Every so often ask yourself, Does she feels okay right now with me? What I can do to make her feel even more relaxed and comfortable?" It will pay dividends.

When I say be a leader, thats exactly what I mean. Pay attention to the people around you, lead them and make them feel the best in every situation possible. If you see it hurts her to stand in high heels, dont ask " Would you like to sit down?" because she will p robably say no because her friends are over here, she doesnt want to seem like shes being picked up, or some other reason. Instead say, Lets go over there and sit down. She will follow because its simpler to follow than to decide and she REALLY wants to sit down. You havent forced her to make a decision and by taking a little initiative, youve isolated the girl from her group to a better seduction location.

Using the same principle Its 2 AM, and of course after clubbing everyone is hungry. All you need to say is, Hey, Im hungry, lets get some food. You can keep me a company, and you are halfway home. If you ask her, Would you like to get something to eat, she will think of a million reasons why she shouldnt. Take the lead!

If you develop emotional intelligence, recognize how she feels, and have the courage to be a man who takes initiative, you will become the man that that those girls are standing around waiting to meet. When you take control of all your interactions, your results will improve dramatically.

Suggested reading (pdf e-books):

Tranceboy - The Lazy Mans Guide To Seduction
Tyler Durden - Plant And Stare Opener

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A Great Idea For Improving Self Confidence

A great idea for improving self confidence is to learn how to celebrate your achievements in life. It’s often easier to dwell on the things you can’t do, or the mistakes you have made, but the reality is that there are things that you will be able to do better than most people, and even one or two things at which you will excel.

Have a think about the things you do well and give yourself credit for them. For instance, think about the skills you need to do your job- chances are you are able to complete tasks which others would feel unable to attempt. If you are a stay at home mom, think of all the skills needed to raise happy healthy children. Think about all the things others come to you for- are you able to fix cars better than any mechanic? Do you bake the best cakes? Are you the one your friends always turn to when they need relationship advice or a shoulder to cry on? These are all achievements and should be celebrated as such.

If you are finding it difficult to think of anything you are good at, try asking other people- you may be surprised at the answers! We often overlook our own strengths and fall into the trap of thinking we have nothing of value to offer. One good way to celebrate achievement is to write your own Achievement Inventory- get a good quality notebook and write down everything you have achieved so far during the course of your life. Chances are you have achieved far more than you realize. Don’t think you can only write major life successes- think of all the skills you use as a part of your job, or the little things you have done which have made a difference. These could be anything from helping a friend out in their hour of need to raising money for your favorite charity. Write down all the things you are proud of, no matter how small. Once you start writing, you should feel inspired- read through your Achievement Inventory regularly to give yourself a boost- and don’t forget to keep adding to it!

You could expand on this by writing another list- this time, write down all the things you would like to try, and make a commitment to yourself to go ahead and try them! Be as creative or adventurous as you like- write a novel, learn to paint, climb a mountain or read a book which has been recommended to you. If you prefer, start off with something relatively easy and move on to greater challenges, but make sure you enjoy each activity- if you find you are not enjoying it then move onto something else. Each new achievement will boost your confidence levels and should be added to your Achievement Inventory. As well as improving self confidence levels, you could find a whole new passion and talent in your life or even a new career!

Suggested reading (pdf e-books):

Dr Robert Antony - Total Self Confidence
Carlos Xuma - Supreme Self Confidence

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Find Out About Her Values And Give Her What She Wants

This part can be put in practice during the whole seduction process from the beginningor later, depending on the situation. It is used as a method for collecting importantinformation about the woman with the purpose of getting to know better how to seduceher.As we have already seen, it can be also used as a way to feed her back her valuesand what is important to her and increase the effectiveness of your seduction.If used well and in the correct way, it helps seduction. If used in the wrong way, itacts against you.The correct way to use this technique is to use it so that the woman does not noticewhat you are doing.Another important thing is: if you use this technique but don’t behave in an Alphaway and don't create attraction, the seduction will not succeed regardless of what you do.In your company she will feel as though she is with a girlfriend. So don’t lean onthis technique as your only mean to seduce.This technique is extremely useful for detecting women in whom it is not worthinvesting your time. By using this technique you can understand in advance who thewomen with psychological problems are.You can in this way also discover which are the women who are likely to give youtrouble in some other way. This will enable you to remove them rapidly from your game.You use this also to collect information about:- Her past.- Her family environment.- Her father and mother.Information about her father is very important for knowing how to seduce her. Thiswill be covered in the upcoming books of the Encyclopedia of Pickup, Seduction andFemale Relationships for the modern man.- Her friends, relatives.- Her past relationships with men: very important information for knowing how toseduce her.Used together with the other techniques - so that the woman does not notice it -this is an extremely effective seduction technique.The technique consists of two phases:

1. Trying to understand the woman's values: Finding out about her values.

2. Making her feel that she is in the company of the man with whom she can realizethose values: Giving her what she wants.

Now let's see how it is done:

Finding out about her values: we will return to this subject in a different chapterbecause it is very important.Here I shall describe this technique only briefly.Practically speaking in both the small talk phase and in the rapport phase you talkwith her in a discrete way also for the purpose of collecting information about her: thepeople and the activities she likes and particularly the type of man she likes. Functional values are the things, the events and the people she likes and Innervalues are the sensations and feelings she feels when she is in the company of the things,the events and the people she likes.Practically speaking by using this technique you obtain information about themental state she likes to be in. It is very important to collect information about thesensations and the mental state she likes to have when she is in the company of a man.Finding out about her values is a technique directed first at knowing about thethings she likes (functional values) and then which are the sensations and the feelingsshe feels when she is in the company of the things, events and people she likes (innervalues.) This will be described in more detail in another chapter.

But now, let's have a lookat the following example:

He: “You have a dog, don’t you?”
She: “Yes, how did you know?”
He: “So you like animals”
She: “Yes I adore animals” (this is a functional value.
She likes animals.)
He: “What’s your dog’s name?”
She: “His name is Rolf.”
He: “Nice name. So you have fun with Rolf.”
She: “Yes. What a sensation of sweetness and warmth when I am with him!”

(Those are inner values: the sensations of sweetness and warmth she feels withRolf.) Attention! As I said, finding out about her values has to be done so that she doesnot understand what you are doing. If she understands that you are collecting information for the purpose of getting her into bed, you will get the opposite effect.If you ask too many direct questions, you come out as being pushy and get a verynegative reaction.

Even worse, if you give her the impression that you are asking abouther feelings and mental states in order to please her, you put yourself in the subservientframe; she classifies you as a beta and non-confident and treats you like a girlfriend.Giving her what she wants: after a while the seducer and the woman go on talkingabout other subjects. The seducer starts to use the information obtained when he foundout about her values for seductive purposes:

He: “Strange. This evening I feel different.”
She: “How do you feel this evening?”
He: “Maybe it is this sense of connection we feel here. There is a strange sense ofsweetness I have not felt for long time.”
She: “Yes. Tell me.”He: “I don't know. The sweetness of this evening in the town makes me feel good.There is so much passion and warmth in the way you live. It is like we are having anincredible connection.”

He just gave her what she wanted: making her experience those feelings with him.Remember that NLP has demonstrated how words feed the brain with feelings andsensations. By describing a pink elephant or a panther we have people "seeing" and "feeling" a pink elephant or a panther.He has her feeling the feelings she considers as pleasurable for her!And has her link those feelings to his presence!Now that is for a woman a much more valuable experience than for a man!At this point the game is done. He lightly touches her hand and if she does notresist he takes her hand in his own. We are ready for the close.Of course, this is only a simple example. In reality it is not that simple, but withpractice you will become an artist and learn to perform all the infinite possible variationsof the above.

Suggested reading (free books):

Robert Anue - Forbidden Pattern The Shadow And The Rising Sun
Ken Lingu - How To Give Her A Head Massage

Keywords: mike  large women dating  hypno zebu  seduction excerpt  seduction trends womens  

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How Asian Singles And Personals Date Online

Asia is the biggest continent of this planet in terms of population but still it is difficult to find right people to marry here. Men and women face difficulties in finding their life partners in their localities. Online dating sites are providing services to such men and women for many years now and there are free and paid dating sites. Asian singles are dating online through these sites and are getting their life partners. The number of people who join online singles dating services in Asia is increasing every month which indicates the popularity of online dating sites. The singles dating websites have an advantage, users are sure that anyone they will contact will be single and will be looking for a single as they are.

Free online dating sites are much more popular in Asia as these do not charge any fee to join but some functions on the sites are limited and require premium membership to have access to those functionalities. Some sites provide free access for sometime so that users take overview of the site and then these sites place membership for further use. The growing interest of Asian singles and personals in online dating services is amazing and the services are providing results in finding people of their perfect matches.

Life is so busy in 21st century and people do not find time to go out and date. Online dating sites are useful in this way and singles can talk via these sites 24 hours, even they are on job or travelling. Online dating websites have brought ease to people. Users just have to register their profile to have access to these sites. It is advised to users by site to upload pictures and some profiles do not get activated unless a picture is uploaded on them. This helps in attracting more people and in increasing profile views. The more people view your profile; more will be the chances of making a match.

The picture on display of your profile does wonders and it makes sense too. Only people liking your profile picture will contact you and you are rest assured that chances of rejection will be low. A lot of online dating sites in Asia provide access to members who have joined lately and their profile pictures are being displayed on the home page. You do not have to go through all the profiles to look for new ones.

There are so many websites available to date online and selecting one which is appropriate for you will not be easy. You should shortlist the things you want in a site and then try searching for Asian online dating services. You should ask for the latest pictures from the contact you are interested in. Only reveal your personal information to singles that you want to contact and they too should have an interest in you. There will be thousands of Asian single men and women waiting for you when you are in an online dating site and chances of finding your perfect partner are very bright.

For more information Meeting thousands Asian singles online at free Asian dating service Many single Asian personals waiting for you Please visit our dating service to seek single women and men for free Take action today to find your other half online.

Suggested reading (pdf e-books):

Hw Long - Sane Sex Life And Sane Sex Living
John Alanis - Online Personals Copywriting

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Art Of Flirting

Flirting is an important social skill. It can be used to display interest. It can be used to judge another person's level of interest. It can be used to attract interest from others. In many ways, everything you do or say in the dating and attraction process is a form of flirting.

Skilful flirters make it look effortless. They blur the line between social butterfly and sexual being. Their confidence makes them alluring, their bravery makes them intriguing and their sexuality makes them intoxicating. They're never afraid of attracting the type of attention they want.

Great flirts speak and act in ways that suggests greater intimacy than is generally considered appropriate to the amount of time they've know the person they're flirting with, without actually saying or doing anything that breaches any serious social norms. They walk a fine line, but land lots of dates by doing so.

The more attraction skills you master, the more effective flirt you'll be. Attraction All-Stars has included the most effective of those skills below. So stop waiting on the sidelines and start using your personality, body language and conversation skills to flirt with other singles.

Attitude

The best flirts are risk-takers with unshakable confidence. They have an 'I don't care what you think of me because I know I'm awesome' attitude. They expect to win over everyone they meet. Because of this attitude, flirts have powerful body language, are able to break through people's touch barriers quicker and are able to show a larger range of their personality through conversation.

Flirting goals

Know the purpose of your flirting. Are you just trying to win over the crowd? Are you trying to gage the interest of the handsome doctor? Are you trying to show the stunning lawyer you're interested in her? If you're going to flirt, have a purpose in mind. Knowing your goal can help ensure you don't step over the line of appropriate social behavior.

Time and Place

There is a time and place for everything... and flirting is no different. Flirting is carefully balancing on the line of appropriate social behavior. A step over that line can quickly take you from flirt to floozy. It can turn respect to disrespect. It can turn a comfortable situation uncomfortable. Read verbal and non-verbal signals and understand your environment to ensure you don't step over the line.

Be a sexual being

We are all sexual creatures. It's important people see you as one. Flirting helps ensure you don't land in the 'let's just be friends zone' later. If you try to appear non-sexual to avoid being seen as a threat, you're not going to be seen as potential dating material either. Have singles see you in a sexy, playful and flirtatious way.

Build sexual tension

Talk to, tease and titillate their sexual inhibitions. It is important singles see you as a potential sexual partner without either of you talking about sex. Sexual tension is heightened through flirtatious touch, voice tone, eye contact, facial expressions and body language. Done properly, it can fill a non-sexual conversation with sexual overtones.

NON-VERBAL FLIRTING

Proper Posture

Your posture will tell people if you're willing to be approached. It will inform them of your comfort level around them. It will show them which conversation topics to follow or abandon. All great flirts have powerful posture (chin up, shoulders pulled back, chest out, back straight, feet firmly planted on the ground). They also keep their posture open.

If someone is uncomfortable with another person they will close their posture. This is done by crossing their arms or holding a drink in front of their chest. To show comfort, flirts always keep their hands at their sides, tucked behind their back or on the person of interest. Flirts know by doing this, they send subliminal signals of interest. An open posture sends all the right signals without saying a single word.

Suggested reading (pdf e-books):

David Jones - The Art Of Internet Dating
Kate Fox - Guide To Flirting

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Get Past Breakups And Failed Relationships

Don't Think Twice,You Can Make It How to get past breakups and failed relationships.

Q: I am always asking myself what's wrong with me because most of my relationships have failed or lead to breakups. Could there be a problem with me?

A: It's easy to blame ourselves when relationships fail. Sometimes we push others away, and sometimes they push us away. Other times there is no one at fault because the feelings simply die and the relationship naturally ends. It's also easy to lose perspective when we're in pain – all losses, big or small, produce feelings of anger, sadness and even denial to some degree. What you are feeling is normal. Let's start thinking of breakups in another way – as learning experiences. You should feel proud that you were open and vulnerable enough to give another person your love and devotion. Such vulnerability is a sign of great faith and bravery. Vulnerable people are not weak, they're strong. Love is a risky proposition, but nothing in the world can compare to the payoffs. However, no amount of energy can transform relationships that are wrong for us into ones that are right for us. Remember, every one of your relationships helps you learn more about yourself and what you want and need in a partner. In this sense, relationships that don't last are not failures. They are opportunities for learning. You will find strength, perspective, and renewed hope and optimism if you view your past relationships this way. Remember that you're attractive inside and out. That is not an opinion; it's a fact. You know this, because you've had several romantic relationships. What you might not have had yet is a romantic relationship with a truly compatible person – and that makes all the difference in the world. Short-term compatibility is not the same as long-term compatibility. It takes a strong and persistent individual to find a truly compatible person, because it takes time and knowledge to recognize long-term compatibility when you encounter it. Finding love is first finding out what you want and need for yourself, and what you have inside to give to another. That is a process, rather than merely an outcome. You can find that compatible person! Use the TRUE Compatibility Test™ to help you cull the prospects and find someone with whom you will have lasting love. Our test will not tell you whether you are going to fall madly in love with another person on a physical level, just whether it is a good idea if you do.

Q: I don't have problems meeting ladies online, and they seem to enjoy writing back and forth. I'm not at a loss for words and can usually get a date. My problem: I have worked in law enforcement most of my life and was injured in the line of duty. I live an independent life, but I look like someone with a disability, like polio, MS or CP. From my experience this can be a very big turn-off for a lot of ladies looking for Mr. Right. How can I deal with this, even after telling them the truth? This can lead to hurt feelings all the way around! Can you help?

A: First and foremost, thank you for your lifelong service in the public safety and security sector. We're deeply and aggressively committed to making online dating safer, so we especially appreciate the sacrifices you've made and are sensitive to the issues you face on a daily basis. It's crucial for you to understand that women are much more forgiving about looks than men when it comes to romantic love. Women place greater emphasis on other characteristics – like an attractive personality, sense of humor and the ability of a man to provide emotional and financial security. Look at the loving relationship the actor Christopher Reeve continued to have with his wife after his paralyzing injury. It sounds to me like you have these positive characteristics, which often outweigh the influence of physical attributes. If you agree, then emphasize these traits more in your online profile and in your conversations. What's amazing in your case is that you have all of these things to offer a prospect despite your physical limitations. This fact will make you particularly attractive to the right woman. Only by being upfront and honest about yourself will you find that right woman – one who defines Mr. Right in terms that transcend physical ability.

Good luck, and please keep us posted on what happens!

Suggested reading (pdf e-books):

Martha Kelley - Gender Differences And Leadership
John Shore - Seven Reasons Women Stay In Abusive Relationships

Keywords: silly routines silly  being your  common mistakes when  masculinity  turn friend girlfriend  dmitry  super your  

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Getting One Night Stand But Cant Perform

A lot more men have this going on than you think. They get a woman into bed, and find that their mind seems to want to go faster than their bodies do.
Often guys who have this also don't orgasm with women the first time they have sex with them--they need to go at it a few times before they relax enough to "let loose."

This is more normal than you think. Many men, especially shy men, or men who haven't had much success with women, think that they want to have a lot of one-night stands...but when they finally succeed in getting a stranger into bed, they find that they aren't interested after all.

This can be incredibly disconcerting. You do the work to be seductive, you actually succeed, you've got into bed some hot 19-year-old whose name you can't even remember and whose last name you've never even heard, and your manhood decides to take a vacation on you. This is the thanks you get? What the hell is going on here?

It turns out that while most men think they want to have one-night-stands, a great number of them only like the idea in theory, or in fantasy. They are stuck with these sad facts: Being sexual is really pretty intimate. Not surprisingly, being that intimate requires a good deal of trust. Trust takes time to build. Therefore, those men who are not good at one-night stands have to accept that they don't actually want the instant-sex that they think they want.

So what's a fellow to do? We suggest that you listen to you dick when you are being sexual. But how to do that? You can say to a woman you are getting to know, "I have to tell you--I need to go slow into sexuality. I can be kind of, well, shy, when I first get sexual." After giving that warning, just listen to what you want to do with a woman, and don't go any farther than your dick wants you to.

The weird thing is, this little speech (and following up on it) can have two almost paradoxical effects:

First, telling a woman you want to slow down the sexuality in your relationship is often such a turn-on to her that she will end up wanting to go faster, or at least as fast as you chose to go. Unexpectedly, telling her you want to slow down puts you in the driver's seat with a woman, putting YOU in charge of how fast sexuality goes. This makes you more of the "desired commodity" in the relationship.

Second, taking the pressure off yourself to have to perform with a woman can make it easier for you to, uh, perform. If you know that you don't have to 'get it up,' and she knows you aren't going to go nuts to push it, the freedom that knowledge gives you can make sex even more likely to have sex happen.

Third, practice often makes perfect. If you don't have to perform, and both you and her know it, in time you might get better at one-nighters. At two AM, after drinks and late-night pizza and who-knows-what-else on the way to your one-nighter, she may not notice if you fall asleep half-way to going the distance, anyway.

But the real point of all this is that accepting yourself as someone who actually isn't interested in one-nighters is a really good idea. Don't worry, you'll get used to it in time...and not trying to be something you are not will ultimately improve your sex life.

Suggested reading (pdf e-books):

Dating Insider - Getting The First Date
Helen Ferry - Get The Facts About Condoms

Keywords: silly routines silly  being your  common mistakes when  masculinity  turn friend girlfriend  dmitry  super your  

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